30 Valentine’s Day Cards That Are Anything But Romantic


If you’re really in love with someone then every single day should be Valentine’s Day. You should be over the moon with the person you’re with and do everything you can to pull romantic gestures out of nowhere to make them happy.

With that being said though, there are some expectations for Valentine’s Day that people have: you’re expected to have something magical planned that’ll get your SO feeling all warm and fuzzy inside.

The thing about romance though, is that there are several ways of going about it. Humor, in many instances, can be very, very sexy. But there’s a fine line between funny and tone deaf, and telling a joke on Valentine’s Day might just ruin the whole romantic ambiance you’re trying to set up. What you’re looking for is playful, not offensive.

So if you’re going to attempt to give any of these Valentine’s day gift or cards to your significant other, tread lightly.

If your date doesn’t want to make Valentine’s Day great again, you may have a short night.

Or if they’re a big time conspiracy theorist, this card may freak them out.

Yes, this is a real card. Yes, this could potentially end your relationship. Or make it way better. Choose wisely.

If you think your date would be offended by portraying certain genocidal maniacs as adorable figures of love and romance, maybe stay away from these.

Probably just better to avoid giving this one entirely.

This one does come off a bit strong.

If they’re a Lion King fan, then you might have a good chance.

Such a shame they’re not going to see anything on the card.

There are several naughty cards for the Harry Potter lover out there.

Or if they’re a huge Star Wars nerd who’s a fan of a particular SNL sketch.

Maybe they love terrible and borderline gross puns?

Or maybe you want to get high on something other than love this V-Day?

You better hope the person you’re giving this to is a chemistry nerd. But if they failed orgo, well, you might trigger some PTSD.

It might be better to cover your bases and get a Breaking Bad themed chemistry card.

Or maybe you want to take a more presidential stab at expressing your feelings?

Even if they are ridiculously offensive.

Then there are the straight-up terrible metaphors.

In this instance, honesty might not be the best policy.

Keep this one to yourself…

You might be better off just playing it safe this Valentine’s Day, but if you do decide to use an out of the box card to tell someone how you really feel and they like it, then you may have just found the one.

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